I’m often asked, "You don't want children?" What are you waiting on? I am sure people wonder how I have remained patient with God’s plan for my life when I have been married 13 years and I am 43 years old without children. Yes, I do want to feel the joys of motherhood. I’ve talked so much about it, it’s no secret— that I have had major challenges in experiencing motherhood. And most people would have given up the hope of ever experiencing it if they had experienced what I have gone through in the past 13 years.
Real talk - I have wanted to give up!
There have been many moments when I’ve been tired of waiting. I have been frustrated at dealing with the constant pain and wanted to give up in defeat. In 2017 I thought that my chances were gone and was on the verge of throwing up my hands. But as reflect on all that has transpired in my personal world over the last 12 months, it is only by God's grace that we are still standing with our heads lifted to the heavens, filled with praise and a positive perspective on what has transpired.
I am thankful for my Father’s grace in these 13 years. I am thankful that when life and people looked at us and say, "There is no way," God said, "I AM THE WAY!"
I am thankful that in our sufferings, we rejoiced, "Knowing that our suffering produced perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope did not put us to shame.… "(Romans 5:3-6).
I give praise because we may have been grieved by the various trials of 2017, which tested the genuineness of our faith, but we now give glory and honor at the revelation that the suffering was just for a season. And we can rejoice knowing that in little while we will be rewarded with our BLESSING! (1 Peter 1:6-7)
I am grateful that what was meant for evil against us, my Father used it for good and that those heard how we overcame that evil, through the favor of God, were saved (Genesis 50:20).
I am appreciative that through the tribulation of the illness that was designed to bring suffering and a great loss we maintained our dignity. We were not ashamed because we believed and are yet convinced that God will deliver the BLESSING He promised us. (2 Timothy 1:12)
I am overjoyed that the tests were turned into a testimony and every bit of anguish, sadness and pain in that last season we endured with patience, prayer, and praise. We can stand today in this season proclaiming that every situation we arose more than conquerors.
What have you been praying and asking God to manifest in your life? A spouse? A new career? Change in a relationship? Change in your financial situation? Don't give up or lose hope because it seems as though you are in this season for too long. "For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us." (Romans 8:18)
So, as we go into the first month of 2018, we can say we have had our share of troubles but we can proclaim that even though it may look like we lost a season, we can see by grace He is rewarding us with NEW LIFE!
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Because I am always in thought and a vessel of truth, I have no choice but to give them to you with no filter. Take a moment to read my very authentic and vunerable thoughts.