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MY TRANSPARENT
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 Who do you love and cherish the most? I know that I have an boundless love for my family and friends that fuels my life. I have always placed a high value on relationships and friendships. I didn’t have to really make friends as my sister Shantell was my day one. We are close in age and my Father made sure we rolled tight. My cousins were my extended friends. We had relationships that resembled sibling relationships. You can see that in my long-time relationships that are not connected by bloodline. I have been fortunate to still be in relationship with my first best friend from Jr. High School, Leslie. We met at 13 years of age. And my second-best friend from college, Rhonda. We met in high-school. I have known them both most of my life! And it has given me so much joy to witness them have families and pursue their dreams. When they share good news with me, I am excited for them like it is me. Because they are my day-ones, my girls, my compadres, my aces in the hole. And when they are living their best lives, that gives me joy. But as I have grown older and developed relationships outside of my immediate family and circle I have learned that there are quite a number of people that have not had these kinds of relationships. I hear so many stories of people not having close knit ties to family. Or even to their siblings. And let’s not even discuss friendships. This is unfortunate as relationships make up the fabric of our world and the Body of Christ. But so many don’t speak well of relationship anymore. It is thru relationships that we experience the nature of God in the flesh. But when everybody is screaming NO new friend’s courtesy of Drake it makes life that much harder. We spend a lot of time pointing out all of the negative facets of relationships these days, and keeping it real one hundred, people now are the most shady, disloyal and finicky than I have ever seen in my life. But their bad can’t outweigh the good of those who know how to stick close! When I look around as our life has transitioned, ebbed and flowed, the day ones that were committed to riding for us are still here and we are ETERNALLY GRATEFUL TO THEM – their LOVE kept us! When they purchased my book, they encouraged me to keep writing the testimony. When they shard our ministry efforts, attended our services, shared our message it encouraged us to keep pressing toward the mark. When they consistently sow into our community initiatives it helps us take the Love of our Father to those in need. And that’s where we put our focus on the DAY ONES who demonstrated the goodness of God in the land of the living. It easy to focus on the bad. But the danger of focusing on the bad is that you lose sight of the bigger picture and you get stuck in the who didn’t, who should have, and who could have. And once those thoughts permeate your psyche you began to build walls to keep out those who have failed to live up to the position they held in your life. And those walls will have you trying to ‘do it by yourself’ instead of walking with Him and the people He has now provided to show you His uncompromising, unconditional, unfailing love. In trying to do it “alone” we lose our effectiveness. Ecclesiastes 4:9 tells us that two people are better off than one. If we fall alone we are in real trouble, but with two, if one person falls the other can reach out and help. We can keep each other warm. We can put our coins together to keep each other from starving. We can put our heads and resources together to advance the vision. As you continue to move forward know that the Kingdom will advance in you thru partnership with new day ones. You will be presented with opportunities to develop relationships with family, friends, neighbors and co-workers. But be mindful that our Father will change the order of relationships to show that true kinship is not just a matter of flesh and blood or who you have known the longest. Our Father is the source of all relationships and His relationships are rooted in an unwavering and unstoppable love. And He has predestined connections ready to manifest for you to experience a higher reality of relationships. The less you resist, the more you trust, the easier you will experience the unfailing love from those sent to show you true relationship. The new order of your life requires a new order of loyalty, honor and respect from DAY ONE and beyond, so be open to the God connections preordained for you, as they will really help you to move ahead into living YOUR BEST LIFE. If this thought has been profitable to you, please share with your friends and family. Like or click the social share button or leave a comment in the box below for Pastor Yolanda.
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 I had no intentions on writing a blog for my Thursday Transparent Thought as my mind has been slightly drained from school assignments, studying, teaching and traveling; my thoughts were not clear. And when my mind is cloudy I have learned to get quiet as I know this is a sign that I need to draw near to my Father to rectify my hearing. So, as I prepared to post a thought from last year, I refreshed my Facebook memories and all my posts from July 19th populated and then it hit me why I have been slightly off the past few days, this is the anniversary of the WORST day of my life -- It's the day my Father died in 2008. July 19th is a day that will be forever etched in my soul. This day is a reminder of the greatest loss my heart has ever felt. The first few years after his death were so hard. I didn't think I would ever find joy again however, nevertheless. As I scrolled down my memories timeline, I was able to see the progression of my nevertheless. July 19, 2009 "On this day a year ago my best friend, my daddy passed on to his heavenly existence. Daddy, I miss our talks, I miss your gentle voice.I miss your big hearty laugh. I miss your faith in God. I just miss you being here in my life. I haven't been the same." July 19, 2010 I would give anything just to hear my father's voice one more time…to have him hug me and tell me "I love you Daughter"! Those who are blessed to have your father...please cherish it as there is nothing like a father's love...and there's no pain greater than losing it!! RIP Daddy (4/23/51-7/19/08)..Love your Daughter!" July 19, 2012 "July 19th has not gotten easier for me…it is always a reminder that there is still a void in my heart and that his presence is sorely missed in my life. But I can say that I have found a peace in knowing that he is finally at rest and that he instilled in me valuable life lessons that are serving me well! So continue to rest Daddy....you have prepared me for this journey and your legacy will continue to live on in me and generations to come! RIP Rev. M.N. Kelty (4/23/51-7/19/2008) #DADDY'SGIRL4LIFE" July 19, 2013 "July 19, 2008 was the worst day of me and my baby sisters life. My beloved Father took his last breath on earth and went home to glory. We were distraught! We both felt as though we could not go on another day. We were severely heartbroken. Thoughts of what were we going to do without the man who was always there raced through our minds. This man gave his life for us, so that we can have not only what we needed but what we desired. He was our confidant, our best friend and our protector. But, little did we know that he had prepared us for this moment in time. He prepared us to depend on each others, but most importantly he taught us to lean and depend on our Heavenly Father for strength, for comfort, love and protection. And here my baby sister and I are… five years later and it just seems like yesterday that he left us in the flesh. But we do not cry today. She and I did what he always taught us to do, to lean on each other but most importantly, we leaned on our Heavenly Father like never before in our lives. We rejoice today that we didn't lose our minds and allow grief to overtake us. No, we stand today praising God that we were able to spend time at the knee of our earthly Father, Reverend Marvin Kelty. We take comfort in knowing that he left us with an inheritance that is priceless and we as, Kelty's daugthers, walk in our kingdom inheritance and we do so with grateful hearts that our earthly father prepared and showed us the way! "Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it." ~ Proverbs 22:6 July 19, 2015 "For the past 6 years I have dreaded this day, and I expressed it. However, today is so different. I am writing with a praise coming from my lips, because everything that my earthly father has taught and poured into us has ripened on the vine. 7 is symbolic of completeness and wholeness and here we stand today saying that grief did not take us out, instead it tore us down and our Heavenly Father came in and reconstructed us into a new, improved and better sanctuary! I would have never imagined that we would be actually carrying the mantle of our father. I thought for sure our lives were over as we knew it, but in essence it had just begun. We leaned into what he told us and that was to lean on each other and our heavenly Father. Because of that wisdom we have become stronger, wiser and sharper. Therefore, today we put on our cloaks of joy and we rejoice in the fact that our Father's grace covered us and His mercy kept us so that we could live in the divine inheritance and reap the harvest of my earthly father's work." July 19, 2016 My dad sacrificed his life to keep his family together and to give us a good life. From a child to the time he took his last breath.. I knew we were his life and there was nothing he wouldn't do for us. And he passed that on to us...I ride for mine. #LegacyLives July 19, 2017 Heaven smiled on me when He allowed you to be my earthly Father! uI was blessed with your ability to smile thru it all! The inheritance of your JOY saved my life! As you can see from the progression of my posts I was devastated by the loss of my father, the grief almost took me out of here spiritually, emotionally, and physically, nevertheless, I found joy and peace in knowing that he is finally at rest and that the spiritual and natural wisdom he imparted in me are serving the Kingdom. It didn't happen overnight, but my nevertheless happened. In the English language, there are few words that can change the entire context of a sentence, a conversation, even the outcome of an entire situation and NEVERTHELESS is one of those words. This single word can transform entire situations, and even an entire world, simply by the power of one simple word: NEVERTHELESS. The definition in the original Hebrew means “a ceasing, an end, a finality.” In the New Testament Greek, (quoted from Thayer’s Greek Lexicon, Abridged) it is used “after negative sentences,” and “serves to mark a transition to something new.” It is used as “an opposition to concession.” This simply means that, although the speaker does not "yield to" or "concede to" the circumstance, they have submitted their own will through the power of ‘nevertheless’. Finally, from the Dictionary.com the word simply means, “In spite of all that…” What I want to point out to you today as I honor the life of the man whose death brought me new life is that our power and strength to transition past the pain, the dishonesties, the frustration, the lies in a simple word: NEVERTHELESS. Today the Father has given you His power to insert a nevertheless. This means you have the power and wisdom within you to withstand whatever it is you are going through right now and not just withstand it but it can come to an end. You can transition into something, your new beginnings and new life. You can flow in the divine joy, greatness, and harvest our Father has for you. You see nevertheless being betrayed, persecuted, forsaken, and cast down the wisdom instilled into me by my earthly Father about my Heavenly Father I learned how to oppose instead of conceding to the grief and I flowed into my Heavenly Father. And what He providentially orchestrated for me after the nevertheless has brought me a new and purposeful life. And because of my Heavenly Father's power, what was intended to "harm me works for my good and has saved many lives." (Genesis 50:20) So grab ahold of your nevertheless! Nevertheless, the grief; disappointment; lack; hard times, pressing and beating, breaking and brokenness; negative words; spiteful vengeance and manipulation you can still flow into provision, comfort, happiness, abundance, wealth, and JOY! Nevertheless, you can stil have JOY! If this thought has been profitable to you, please share with your friends and family. Like or click the social share button or leave a comment in the box below for Pastor Yolanda.  There is a song by Wale that I heard entitled "Matrimony" that resonated with me. The beginning of the song starts with a monologue from Jerry Seinfeld. Seinfeld likens getting married to a ride on a roller coaster, the first hill of the roller coaster is the engagement and the wedding is at the top by then you're just screaming. Wale thens says, "Even if you make plans you never think you're really ready for marriage?" Seinfield replies, "No it's like any growth. You can't prepare for growth. You're gonna have a new life be a new person. Wale then says that "he is in his late 20s, and had never been to a wedding." That really struck me but it was not surprising that we have a generation of young adults that have never witnessed two people joined in matrimony. In this generation, marriage isn’t very popular, it's become a negative term in this culture and society. We no longer look at marriage with anticipation and joy, but with fear or we don't look for it at all. People are scared that if they get married then there is the possibility of getting divorced, there will be no happiness or that it will not be fulfilling. I should feel that way considering my parents were married for over 20 years and divorced when I was eighteen. Surviving my parents divorce and being married 14 years this month; 24 years in a relationship I must say that I have seen my fair share of good, bad and real ugly in marriages and relationships. Matrimony has its good times as well as its bad. And it is not easy to stay married during difficult times especially in our society. I know without a doubt the only way we have survived the ebbs and flows of this journey called marriage is because we have a third person in this marriage with us, God. "And if someone overpowers one person, two can resist him. A cord of three strands is not easily broken." Ecclesiastes 4:12 No, marriage does not guarantee a lifelong relationship, but neither does any relationship. Marriage was designed to be a lifelong relationship, a commitment and a covenant. The only reason it is not is because we have made it that way. We too often look for any easy way out. If we feel unhappy, we just leave. If we feel unfulfilled, then leave. If your spouse makes you mad, you just leave. We live in a fast-food society. We want things easy and we want it now. No way we want to do anything that requires effort. We go into marriage thinking that we will have the perfect little marriage and the perfect little family in the cookie-cutter house and we will never argue and get angry. Wrong! We need to know what we are actually agreeing to. We are agreeing to stay with our spouse when things are the worst they have ever been, even when they make you angry, call you names and say hurtful things that damage your feelings. Marriage is not a continuous date. You now get to see the good, the bad, and the ugly. I know first-hand the dangers of weak commitment in marriage. After Monte and I were newly married, we would throw the big "D" and "S" word out as we dealt with choices and decisions that threatened the covenant of my marriage. We have been very transparent about the stumbling blocks we have encountered. We decided early on if we wanted to be married, divorce and separation was not an option and we are forced to work things out. And working it out has not been an easy road. After the beautiful wedding, I have had two major surgeries to battle issues with my fertility since we have been together, losing two grandfathers, a father and an aunt in the span of four years and in between all of this there were job losses which brought on money problems, confusion, miscommunication and interference from unwanted life situations. But through it all I have had to remember that I love him and I vowed to sustain through all of the good and bad times. And I had to learn to lean on the third cord who is God. I really don't know how in the world people do it without God though. He has become the center of our home, and in those days that we could really could hurt each other Christ who is the umpire brings a peace and makes us see each other through His eyes. Hence, the key to surviving is seeing marriage and each other through God's eyes, hearing each other with God's ears, lifting each other with God's hands, encouraging each other with God's Words, and loving each other with God's heart. Marriage is about choosing each day, each minute, to honor God with our words and actions, and in turn, we honor our spouses. Marriage was created by God for our good, for the good of our society, and for His plan to be fulfilled. It’s about companionship, pleasure, responsibility, commitment, romance, raising the next generation—the whole package. It’s the most difficult and yet the most fulfilling relationship we experience during our time on earth. And that’s why it’s worth fighting for. So, this month as we celebrate 14 years of marriage I pray for troubled marriages or just marriages in general. I pray that God will bring restoration and healing. I pray that marriages are strengthened. I pray that fulfillment and joy flows abundantly. I speak life and death to the issues now affecting the restoration of marriages, and I declare a release of the awesome power of God to restore strengthen and heal marriages to #StayTogether. If this thought has been profitable to you, please share with your friends and family. Like or click the social share button or leave a comment in the box below for Pastor Yolanda. |
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